Wednesday 17 February 2010

Surrender

Oh how determined I was not to let my pregnancy invade this blog too much. Of course I was setting myself up for failure. This blog is supposed to be about my travels and other types of journeys and this thing that is happening to me now may be one of the most intense journeys of my life. Even more so than Zion? Even more so than Japan? Even more so than the journeys one makes in the subconscious; meeting the trickster who I am sure played a role in this situation I am in now. (Not that I am complaining!)

And so I surrender. There will be posts about this growing tummy of mine on this blog. Just as there will be posts about related subjects such as people posting their kids' pictures as their own avatars (what's up with that?), terminologies that seem to be designed to make any future parent as confused as possible (why 'hydrofielluier'? why?), future logistics (two times more kiddie, two times more planning?), clothes (do I really need a whole new garderobe for this spring?), etc.

I guess my real qualm about writing all these things is that I somehow don't feel quite at home in them. I have been avoiding all things 'babby' for so many years now, sometimes actively taking a detour and all that, that it now feels incredibly strange to have to immerse myself in the whole affair. It feels a little like betrayal. I used to find it difficult to listen to other people ranting and raving about their pregnancies and kiddies, therefore now I find it difficult to do the same... Yet, at the same time it is an undeniable part of my life. Better get used to it.

EDIT - Oh wait: I am currently 15 weeks along, out of 40.

No comments:

Post a Comment